drinks with my "out of touch" friends at least once or twice a year. So today, I went to happy hour with a couple of old friends, Jamie Lee and Grace.
Although they live nowhere near, they fly in, we have tons of d

This one is from Jamie Lee.
Arnold,
It's Jamie. I know we haven't talked in a while, but I thought I would drop you a note. I saw your picture the other day, and you're not looking too well. I mean, I know you're getting older, like we all are, but with all that money, get some work done. You're the fitness guy. The guy who could bench press me and two of my body guards at once! (And wow, what the four of us would do after that was just wild.) Sorry, I got off track. Anyway, I noticed you were looking a little stressed. Stress caused by your career, I'm sure. You were certainly never stressed making movies. "True Lies" was a contrived piece of crap, as we both know, but we had fun making it. We had such big dreams back then.

But now, what's happened to you now? You've posed naked. You've posed naked in a gay magazine. You were naked in movies, and you were the fucking terminator! You could be using your authority as Governor to do so much. And now you're going to veto the gay marriage bill? How many gay friends do you have, from your weight lifting days, your movie career, and just from living in California! And you don't even say it yourself, your press secretary announced it. What a pussy thing to do. I know you're planning on announcing your intent to run for governor again, and just think how many people would vote for you if you stood up for equal rights, that all people deserve? And there's still a ton of closeted gays you don't even know about that would vote for you! Even Ryan Seacrest would vote for you if you did the right thing. (Not that he's closeted, but you get the point.)
But no, apparently you are now just an out of shape, old, politician who plays it safe. Try to remember the good old days, and do the right thing.
Jamie Lee
p.s. let me know if you see any good scripts, my career's been a little slow lately. My latest and biggest appearance in years is on some blog with vomit in the title.
This next one is from Grace. She isn't quite as eloquent, but good communication basically boils down to if your point gets across. I think Grace does that here.

Anyway, after a few margaritas, they both admitted their messages probably won't do any good, but they did let me ride in the limo and drink from the limo's bar. So, some times, when things aren't going your way and things look all depressing, at least a limo with a bar is right around the corner. And Grace gives a mean hummer.
12 comments:
Ohhhhh, this is just fabu. Poor Arnold. PS I tag YOU to do the meme I just did on my site, and make shit up. That's what I do!!! (You don't have to do it---Hell, you know that!!!)
Nothing left me me to do but dance...
I live in CA and participate in all the rallies..fuck you, Arnold...and the school teachers hate you, too...
fuck war, fuck san diego, and fuck the haters.
Don Vito for President!
SG, I'll do it, only because it waas you that asked. Can't guarantee how fast though.
Patsy, I noticed that too, but don't let it get to you. The reason I enjoy your blog is that I get everything, funny, serious, drunk, etc. I get less comments on serious stuff, I guess we are typecast.
LB, dance for me. Dance!
Then can I be typecast with both of you guys?
Lb, certainly. As long as you dance.
Those were both great!
You aren't right.
And I love it. :)
Aww.. I was hoping for some Bush bashing!
Wow, it's been a long time since I thought Arnold was cool, and it seems like ages go by with everything I read about him and see of him. I'm just glad I don't live in California -- I'd be ashamed. And to think, they recalled someone better to elect this sorry excuse into office.
Now that gay marriage is legal in some places in Canada, doesn't it seem sad that the US lags so far behind Canada in progressive thinking?
Mr G, I just have this thing for the 80's and 90's version of Grace Jones. :)
Kris, I have never claimed to be right. But I'm glad you like it.
Dan, I dont venture into political territory much, but if I do, Bush is next. :)
Librarian, yeah, Arnie was the man during the Terminator 2 days. I thought about moving to Canada, but I've heard it is pretty cold, eh?
(I stopped commenting on the word verification, but the word this time was pigsxxx. Some bad porn with miss piggy? there's probably a website for that somewhere....)
Oh, you are totally going to get hits now from people using "pig porn" in their keyword search! HAH!
Great. Pig porn fans, visiting my site. Will they ever be disappointed.
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