In my off-line life, I often act as if I don't need any special attention. Online, I am totally different in this regard. I love comments, positive or negative, or just people saying hello. And now I find out we have blogging awards? I would have been working so much harder at the whole blogging thing if I had known this earlier. I would have spell checked, grammar checked, had neighbors proof read my posts prior to posting, color coordinated, and posted on a regular schedule on exact time of every day.
However, no one told me this. So I posted.... well, you've seen it. There's a reason I call it verbal vomit. It spews out, whenever it wants, sometimes not at all, and it is rarely pretty. Funny at times, insightful a few times maybe, but it all boils down to being the vomit in my head.
So, back to me and the awards thing.
I present you with the list of reasons you should vote for me:
1. No one has ever voted for me for anything. (Except for being "least likely to be voted for anything" in my high school yearbook, kids can be so cruel.)
2. Justin (and a few others) feel I spend too much time blogging. But if I was an Award Winning Blogger they would have to shut the hell up, right? Darn right they would. Imagine the following:
Justin: Bobby, you need to get off the computer and take the trash out.
Me: Can't right now, I'm blogging.
Justin: The trash needs to go out, and you've been sitting there for hours.
Me: Hey! You can't just sit down and blog for ten minutes once you've become an award winning blogger. I've got responsibilities, I can't just type out crap now that I'm an award winning blogger. I mean, come on, do award winning bloggers even have to take out the trash?
Justin: This is getting ridiculous, I.....
Me: Once you've become an award winning blogger, you'll understand, and maybe then we'll split the trash responsibilities.
Doesn't that sound great? I think so.
3. Most of you probably have no idea what to get me for Christmas, despite my hints of bourbon and cigarettes. For those that haven't emailed me for my snail mail address to send the bourbon to, a vote for me would be a nice gift, thoughtful and cheap, but oh so meaningful to me. I will print all my nominations, and sleep with them in a small scrapbook next to my bed.
4. I never win anything. Not even a coin toss, so help break my bad luck chain.
5. You don't want that N'Sync picture/fake award on my blog forever. I will remove it when I win a real award, or I will place the scary mannequins back on every post if I don't win. Heh.
Enough groveling for now, I will post details on how to vote for me soon. And news from the off-line world, work is going very well, details coming soon....
13 comments:
Do I need a SAG* card? Am I a member of the academy? If so you have my vote.
*no boob jokes, or I take my vote and stomp off (with my boobs dragging behind me)
I actually came over to check out the "competition" from my other blogger nominated friend. I ended up bookmarking you, dammit. Quit that.
I'll vote twice, since I'm twins.
Daaammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmit. But I want awards too!!!! It's part of my plan for blog domination.
Oh well. Alright. I'll vote for you.
Do we get a mention in your acceptance speech when you win?
Good job Bobby!!!
sarah sylvia cynthia stout, would not take the garbage out...
screw the garbage...you have people to entertain...
me.
after all, you do blog all this for me...cuz i am a narcissist...and a sociopath...
I'll vote three times since I'm MPD. Maybe four times. Oh, and we'll all vote for you, I promise!!
BabyJ, you are always a member in my book. Boobs and all.
Heather, you know I wouldnt do that to you all. They scare me too.
Jules, glad you stopped by, and look forward to seeing you again sometime. The vomit is sometimes addicting.
SG, exactly right. And also, exactly right. (I like personally acknowledging both of you.)
Kris, we're work on your award next. I will have more clout to help you if I win, so.....
Kristi, besides me printing all of the votes out and caring them in a nice little binder (I have one picked out), yes, and acceptance speech/post will have to be forthcoming.
LB, that was always once of my favorites from good ol Shel. That, and why I don't have to wash the dishes (such a dirty boring chore). I actually broke some after reading that, and it worked.
Jo, thanks. I would thank the other two, but you've never shared their names, so could you pass it along for me?
I will vote damn it.
Hey, is it bad that I was voted most likely to be on cops on day?
No, I won't vote for you! In the last two presidential elections I voted and campaigned and was a voter registrar and for crap's sake and my candidates lost! LOST! Broke my heart! Bobby, if I vote for you, you'll lose in a controversial decision with the opponent's votes being tallied by his own supporters, counting more votes than hits to his site! It'll cause massive questions about the aged and accepted election ways and you'll just wish you never even ran. Oh, Bobby! You're better off without my vote. Maybe you'll have a better chance of winning!
I vote for you everyday in my heart.
ohmygod... i was just thinking about this yesterday. I totally meant to blog about it. Listen, I'm an approval whore too.. if there's an award for anything, i want it. i need it. i gotta have it. i'm not that competitive, except for shit i think i can win. and dammit, a blogging award is one of them. I'll tell you what... you knew this was coming... I'll nominate you if you nominate me. I want the best comment trail for my Thanksgiving poem post. I think that was the funniest shit ever. if i do say so myself. no, really, everyone participated and it was a really successful comment trail. Listen, i'll nominate you for whatever you want. sexiest blogger, whatever. please please, we must unite and take the blogging world by storm. ok, i am waaaay too excited this morning. w000t!! you just kick started my award whore-ness... i'll be right back...
Rit, hey, isn't ANY publicity good publicity? And thanks.
Librarian, a vote in your heart is worth so much, sweetie. Thanks. (And I seem to have the same luck....)
Damasta, let's start working on December. We can do it....
it scares me how much importance we place on our little corners of the blogsphere-- but it is nice to forget about the cheap, superficial sentiments of the Christmas season and focus on what really matters: getting Bobby elected King of Blogger.
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